This year my husband and I have been married for 10 years. That is a long time. A decade. 120 months. 3,650 days. That also means when we were first married we were only 21 and 18. We have been through a lot, 3 homes, 3 kids, addiction , disease, new friends, old friends, family ups and family downs, lots and lots of patience and understanding and most of all , love.
I can Honestly say I love him more today than I did the day we got married. When things are going wrong or I'm having a panic attack he is the one person I know can bring me back. He always supports me in every little plan or idea I come up with. He never doubts me. He always pushes me to be better. He at the end of the day is my constant.
We have grown up together. A lot of people we went to school with have been married and divorced already. I understand things don't work out but, I am so proud that we never threw in the towel and gave up. We keep pushing through. We are not perfect, we have had our downs in life but we cherish the ups so much we forget the hard times.
The most important thing we have is communication. we always talk! Sometimes we only get a few minutes alone to talk about the day or concerns we have but we make the time. I always know how he is feeling and he always knows what is going through my mind. Not just because of a look or a touch but because we ask. I see a lot of people who don't talk and I causes so many problems.
Second most important thing is the care we have for each other and our family. If one of us is feeling down or under the weather the other will do what ever we can to help. If I'm feeling sick or stressed Josh will take care of the kids or dinner so I can have some time to get my head together. If he comes home from work and had a bad day , from crohn's, ill do what ever I can to make him comfortable ; like take the kids to my moms or make sure were all quietly working on things so he can rest. It might not seem like a lot but it makes all the difference.
Our best advise for a happy marriage and relationship is to always be honest, understanding, and to think of the other. Secrets, lies, and ignorance get you nowhere. It is so true, Honesty is the best policy. we have to be honest with each other to know how the other feels. Weather it be what's for dinner or how to discipline our children. Then we understand how the other feels and can talk out what our next step will be. when were not together, we still should be. If making plans or decisions, at the end of the day the other person will be with you when you are following through. Bad decision or good. This accounts for all decisions big or small.
In short, were a team. Always cheering for the other and knowing we can count on each other for anything. We have a beautiful life and a beautiful family. I am so lucky to have him by my side for anything, and I know he feels the same. So Love your spouse, talk, understand, be with them every day you can. In the end you wont regret it.
-Mj
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