Thursday, October 13, 2016

The wife of a chron's patient.


Nothing can prepare you for the call you get from your husband that after you finish your shift you will have to take him to hospital and sit in the ER for 6-8 hours and the be most likely admitted for at least a week. To tell him everything will be fine that you will be just fine with three kids and a full time job.
Nothing can change the feeling in your gut as you drive to the hospital that this isn't the right way. To look at him in pain and not be able to stop it.
No one can give you the right words to say to  you children as to why daddy didn't come home from the hospital or why when we go see him we have to suit up like he is radioactive. To answer the hard questions like "will daddy ever be ok?"
No one can help you put on a face when others ask "How is he doing?" when NO he is not well but do they really want to hear it. To smile and say he is ok.
As I hang up the phone and try to wipe away the tears something inside me changes. I have to keep it in and push through my shift.
As we drop off the kids and get in the car i have to hold tight and think about how much better he will feel when hie comes home.
When I get home from a 10 hours at the hospital to get a few hours of sleep before i have to go back to work I hug each of our children and reassure them daddy will come back home better.
And when others ask how he is doing I smile and tell them “ He is not better yet, but he will be.
He WIll Be Better.

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